Get in the Picture, Mom! For years I’ve been touting the message to moms that they truly need to be in pictures for their kid’s sake. I can’t count the number of times I’ve asked a mom to be in a portrait with her child and she’s declined due to being a few pounds overweight, she’s having a bad hair day, her roots need to be colored, she has a blemish, she didn’t do her makeup, she isn’t dressed up, she doesn’t need to be in the portraits, and on and on. REALLY? Do you think your child or children will care when they are 30, 40, 50 or more and looking at old pictures of you? Do you really think they will say, “Wow, mom was 5 pounds over-weight in this picture!” “She really could have done a little something with her hair!” “Why did mom get in the portrait with us and ruin it?” NO! They will be saying, “Ahhhh, this was that time we went to the beach and mom held my hand while we jumped and played in the waves. I’m so glad dad got a picture of it! I loved those time with her.” “Oh, this was the time mom took us to the photographers and jumped in the last picture with us. Look how cute and happy she is!” “I love this portrait of mom. She was so beautiful and vibrant with such a great attitude and love for life. She really taught me to value myself.” Seriously Ladies! Stop making it all about you! Think about what you are leaving behind for your kids. Do you really want to leave behind years and years of photographs without you in them? Trust me, you really don’t! When my mom passed away and we were searching for pictures of her we realized that she wasn’t in many of them. Then we remembered how she never liked being in photos that much so we had stopped including her. As we dug through the pictures we did have, we laughed and cried and remembered fun times, parties, trips, silly times, milestones, weddings, birthdays, celebrations. Not once did any one of us mention her weight, makeup or hair! Not once did any of us wish she was not in a photo! NO, we wished she was in more!
Stop Being Afraid! Get in the Picture!
I beg you ladies to stop being so afraid of how you look, what you have on, what you weigh and GET IN THE PICTURE!!! Today’s photographs and portraits will be tiny time machines for your kids in years to come. Pictures are tactile and digital time machines! Don’t deprive them! Give them as much history as you can about who you are, who they are and who and where they came from. You owe them that. Trust me, they will be so happy you did!
If you don’t believe me, read this post a recently widowed mom wrote in a photography group I’m in on Facebook. Notice that 624 people have liked this post and there were over 50 comments about how wonderful she is.When you look at this picture are you thinking about her weight? Her hair? Her clothing? NO, you are looking at a beautiful, brave, young woman who is glowing with life and vitality! What do you think you would you see if you were her son and looking at this picture at age 25? You would most likely be seeing your beautiful mom in her youth looking lovely and fun with her cute hat. Your mom who loves you beyond belief, even when you don’t deserve it. Your mom who took care of you for all those years, maybe alone. Your mom who was 27 in this photograph and 51 now. Maybe she’s passed away and how would you feel then looking at this beautiful photo?
If this doesn’t convince you, read these blogs and articles.
Huff Post Parents – Lessons Learned from a Year of Staying in the Picture A follow up of Mom Stays in the Picture
There are dozens of articles you could read, but what you really need to do is pick up your camera and take some selfies with the kids to teach your them you don’t have to look perfect, be in the perfect outfit with perfect hair to be secure with yourself and full of life. Schedule a family portrait shoot to show your kids that you value your family history and that you want to record it as often as possible, not only for you, but for them! Have a girls night and take pictures of you having fun with your friends to teach your kids life is about enjoying it, not about worry how you look! Maybe even go so far as to call a photographer and set up a beauty portrait shoot where you can be pampered, glammed up and photographed to teach your kids moms are beautiful too.
What are we teaching our kids!
What are you teaching your kids by hiding from the camera? What would it teach your kids to show them how to be confident, bold, brave, assertive, valued, self aware, etc.? What can it hurt? So you may have a few pictures that aren’t your favorites, but in time, and with age and distance, you will look back on those photos with fondness and realize they weren’t really so bad. You were 5, 10, 20 years younger then after all.
Stop being so self-critical! Start appreciating that you are alive and beautiful and wonderful! OWN IT AND GET IN THE PICTURE, MOM!